my beloved friend, eby to Russia.

In the name of Allah, The Most Merciful and The Wise.

Its been a long time, I lost myself. Try to disappear from all of my friends. Try to hate them and forget them. But in reality, i failed. Unable. Unable to sweep all the memories with them from this.. This mind.. 

Why i did this? The only reason is my SPM results. It has been the part of my past but the wound will never ever cured. 7As. embarassing.

Well, Eby is my bestfriend. And Insya-Allah, forever be. She is a great girl with strong determination. I met her in my lower secondary school, MJSC PDRM Kulim. Thank to Allah, we manage to go to the same upper secondary in Taiping. Nevertheless, since then, we've been separated through different classes, busy time and packed schedule. 

In Taiping, i meet with new Eby. She became more focused and determined while me~ flew away with love. And the result is seen now. Eby has travelled far away across the world and hours to Russia and me,myself.. stuck in Malaysia. However, alhamdulillah.. UIA is still a better place for me rather than any high schools or matriks.. MAybe..

 Well, thanks to Facebook. I manage to see her glorious face, the joyful and sweet moment. Yeah. She is in Russia. As a friend, i am very happy for her, and sad for myself. she know her path. To go to Russia, n be a doctor. While me?.. Still confused and blurred around. Exams, everythng.. Just be done as usual.. with no vision or mission... And at last, im alone. Insya-Allah,, i will find my courage. And do something for my goodness.

p/s : We are not so lame as what we think. Explore. Cause, we will be able to grow.

Maafkan Aku

Bismillahirahmanirrahim..

Saat ak mula menaip, trasa ad titk jernih air yg mgalir di pipi. Huah.bkn nk jiwang ke pe, tp sudenli thosa sntences goes out and actually there are some more. Syukur. Bila pk blk, blog yg xbape dketahui org.. Jd mudah kiranye utk kita meluahkn pe yg dipk n rsa.. 

Maafkan Aku..

Ku pohon kemaafan drpd Tuhan-ku.. Ampunkn ak Ya Allah krana slama ni ak lalai dlm mnjlnkan tggjwbku sbgi khalifah di muka bumi ini.. xterkira byk ye dosa ku.. Selayaknya ak di neraka mu.Tp, Ya Allah,,, Kau la Tuhan Yang Maha Pengampun.. Ku pohon keampunanmu... Ku pohon kasih sayang dan belas ksihan mu... Ak xsggup utk brada walau sejengkal dgn api neraka Mu. Ya Allah.. Ampunkn ak.....

Ak mnangis lg.. 

Maafkan Aku..

Kpd kasihku, maafkan ak.. Xtau perkataan terbaik utk mu ketika ini.. Melainkn...
Maafkan Aku...  Jgn lemah. Ak tau kau kuat. Kau pasti mampu menempuh khdupan ini dgn lbey baik tnpa diriku.. Percaya lah. Sesungguhnya Allah sedang mnguji org2 yg sabar sprtimu..

Saat ini,
Tiada yg lbey baik slen Istighfar.. 

Astaghfirullahalazim...

Moga2 Allah memberikn kekuatan kpd ku dlm mnempuh khdupan yg srba mncabar. Takbir.

we r what we want to be~~

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

Utk pertama kali rasa nk guna 'label' utk post ni. every1 has their ups n down. N skang ni, mmg tgh trasa down. mayb sbab PMS, mayb sbab stres, or mayb sbab pnat. Ntah la.. Xpe la. walau apa pn, sy bersyukur. Ya Allah, sy bsyukur dgn stiap pmberian-Mu. Jgn la Kau menarik nkmat-Mu itu dri hmba-Mu yg lemah ini. alhamdulillah, pd ketika ini, di dorong perasaan utk meluahkn dlm blog ni.. drpd, xkeruan xtntu hala, tbring dgn resah. Mgkin ini adlh yg terbaik. Meluahkn dan cuba mncari pnyelesaian terbaik..

Jadikan hari ini lbey baik drpd smlm, dan hari esok adlh lbey baik drpd hari ni.

Mcm mana? Sbab tu la kna mrancang. an idiom says, people who failed to plan, plan to failed. So?? I need to admit. mayb sbab tu la i felt dis unease feeling rite now.. Allah, sdey ye rsa..... gelisah la hti ni.... xtenang.... minda celaru... fikiran xfokus.... Apakah ini?.

After iftar, balik bilik, solat isya' dan tarawikh. Then, mle menaip slama hmpir sejam utk snarai nama cmpus Buddies. Dan lg sejam+lbey2 ni,, bcelaru fikiran.. Mula la nk bca blog org.. Time tu, rsa cm best sgt bca... Blog myra.. blog fauzan... Then, rsa jeles... Rsa kagum....

Kagum kt fauzan.. coz he kept saying how much he bcame happier day by dy.. Time tu ak terpk. Im suppose to have those nice feeling too.. I dserved too. n im used to b epi. Tp,skang ni dh jd xepi.. Im wondering why,?. N, now. Hm. tau kot sbab pe.. TERLALU DEMAND+BERKIRA.. Hm.xpe la.nk g toilet.later on, smbung lg..